Carl Icahn Now Wants ALL Of Lionsgate
FINAL MGM BIDS DUE FRIDAY: So Who's In And …
Action Comedy TV: Showrunner Matt Nix
SAG National Board Approves Joint Bargaining …
BBC Drama Unfreezes Development Money; …
Lionsgate Board Rejects Icahn's $6/Share
Is Betting On Box Office Good For Films?
Marvel Still Looking For Captain America
'Sopranos' Creator To Film Rock Drama
LIVE-SNARKING THE 82ND OSCARS...
'ALICE' IS A MONSTER! $116.3M Blows Past …
Oscar Not-So-Thriller: Diller Mogul Picnic
'Precious' Sweeps 25th Indie Spirit Awards
Howard Stern Won't Be Next 'Idol' Judge
Justin Theroux Readying 'Zoolander 2' For …
This email circulating around Hollywood was sent by a DreamWorks floater. Last names have been deleted to protect the Semitic-challenged:
Sent: Wednesday, September 24, 2008 5:09 PM
Subject: RE: SWP Mtg. Kristi w/ Kristin and MatthewHey Ryan-
I’m sorry, b/c I’m covering for Lindsey’s usual asst., could you tell me, who’s Rosh Hashanah and why would he/she affect Kristi’s meeting with K and M?
Thanks! I really appreciate it!
Michelle
Comments On Deadline Hollywood are monitored. So don't go off topic, don't impersonate anyone, don't get your facts wrong, and don't bore me.
Loading ... Loading ...
Wow. Wait until Lindsey’s lunch meeting with that Yom Kippur guy. He never eats. And then that 8 day retreat with Han Nukah. Gotta love Hollywood.
Well, a big HAPPY NEW YEAR to Michelle!
Hey, if you don’t know something you ask and find out. She did. How many times on Ash Wednesday am I asked what that dirt is on my forehead? countless.
TO: Michelle
FROM:Legal
cc: SS/JK/DG
Please stop by Yom Kippur’s office for a more detailed explaination ASAP
I am appalled that you would remove Michelle’s last name yet still leave Mr/Ms Hashanahs on your post. Watch out you may get a cease a desist from attorney Yom Kippur.
Hellloooooo, Shiksa!
You get what you pay for.
Yeah and who’s this Yom guy? Last name Kippur? He seems to be interfering with business as well.
A dark day for Apple Temps to be sure.
I had to fire my assistant Chris Tmas cause he took too much time off last decemeber
That’s effffffffing hilarious! Ahhhhh…sweet youth, tomorrow Micheele will be probably the head of the studio, or at least a VP at Fox.
Oy vey!
Holy Jewish Holiday. Don’t they give new employees some sort of test for this stuff?
Wow. Ever heard of Google?
As someone who grew up in a town (in a county) with a Jewish population of zero, I can imagine this happening to a newbie assistant. As funny as it is, I don’t think it is indicative of the average “Hollywood Gentile” nor do I think it is in anyway newsworthy. I only read it because I thought it was a memo from the Alaskan Governor’s office.
This has got to be under the too good to be true category….
My agent sent Mr. Rosh Hashanah a script of mine two months ago and he still hasn’t read it! I just called my agent and said, “screw him! if he won’t read it maybe we should send it to Ms. Yom Kippur, instead?”
Oh my God. Being legitimately Jewish, I’m shocked that she wouldn’t know. It’s Hollywood, after all, and everyone becomes Jewish on Jewish holidays.
Ms. Finke,
This is Mr. Hashanah and I just wanted to note my displeasure at seeing my personal meeting with Kristin & Matthew made public on your blog.
Do you have no decency?
Rosh
ooops
It doesn’t get much kookier than that!
Gotta be a joke…please let this be a joke.
Absolutely priceless!
Please, please, please post whatever Ryan’s reply to Michelle was. I’d love to see it!
Watch Us Explode
Reads like an urban myth. Is this 4 realz?
Yeah okay, I believe that…
Reminds me of the time when “Bram Stoker’s DRACULA” came out, and how many people called the DGA wondering who Bram Stoker’s agent was.
Dear Michelle,
S/he’s only been around for a few millennia, and s/he will still be around when you’ve lost your job!
Good riddance!
Maybe poor Michelle thought that he/she was a Reliance employee.
Isn’t he related to that guy Yom Kippur?
Hey Ryan, could you also tell me about this Xenu character??? He/She/It seems to be affecting my meetings as well. Thanks, Michelle.
Damn is that funny, an all-timer! Can we grow this into a half-hour show?
Sounds like a hoax in order to make the majority of the population (outside of Hollywood anyway) appear foolish.
Same old. Same old.
So much for that fallacy about the Jews running the media. Who IS Rosh Hashanah? And why is RH not returning Michelle’s calls?
We’re all stupid about something or other, and all of us have blind spots. I went 38 years thinking “Danke Shoen” was sung by a woman, when in fact it was Wayne Newton.
Hypothetical response…
Dear Michelle,
You only need to know about Rosh Hashanah once a year. She’s only around for a couple of days, she’s a big deal in this town.
P.S.
Just so you know, about a week after Rosh Hashanah, be sure to meet her good friend: Yom Kippur.
The receiver of the e-mail should have answered: “Rosh Hashanah is Kristi’s dentist, he’s from India.”
That’ll really confuse the poor guy.
“Mr. Spielberg, L’shanah Tova called to wish you a Happy New Year.”
At least she has the intellect to correctly use “affect” rather than incorrectly use “impact” as a verb.
If the kid is a 23-year-old from the midwest, it’s not that big of a deal. They’ve never been exposed to Jewish holidays. If they’re a 23-year-old from the Tri-State area and went to school in the Northeast or what have you, they should be fired because they’re clearly not intelligent/aware of something they should’ve heard of in second grade, and every year since.
Seems more like the former. Unless it’s a Laguna Beach type kid.
It was an ill advised email sure, but very few people from the central states know much about the Jewish holidays. Somebody had to explain it to me when I first moved to L.A. and the agency I worked at was scheduled for the day off. I was just happy to have the time off more than anything.
Oh my… That kind of made my day, actually.
So is that all “Hollywood Gentiles” you’re referring to in your headline? All Gentiles are ignorant of the common customs and holidays of other religions? Yup, there’s nothing like disparaging every member of an entire class of people with the same fallacious characterizations. You’d think that had never happened to Jews…
I just heard that Ben Silverman wants to make a show out of this. The Matzo Ball and The Meatball. It’s about 2 best friends, one Jewish, and one Italian, who exploring dating people outside of their religion.
Oyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
There’s goyem and then there’s Goyem…..
everyone becomes Jewish on Jewish holidays – by Rory L. Aronsky
Not true.
I pass all year round.
I like to leave early on Fridays…
She probably thinks Stephen Spielberg is Irish.
I feel sorry for the girl.
Sure it’s funny. And it’s hard to imagine someone not knowing about rosh hashanna.
But at least she was asking the question and trying to understand.
How many temps are that on the ball or inquisitive to begin with ?
The real jerk here seems to be Ryan for making the inquiry public —- not some poor girl who doesn’t know about jewish holidays.
Growing up a Norwegian Lutheran, I thought Yum Kipper was a tasty tuna hot dish.
What’s “Ash Wednesday?”
“Reminds me of the time when “Bram Stoker’s DRACULA” came out, and how many people called the DGA wondering who Bram Stoker’s agent was.”
Just remember–as Buddy Ackerman said in “Swimming With Sharks”..
“He’s NOT dead! He’s just..unavailable.”
SERIOUSLY though… I’m not defending her here as she is obviously in the WRONG biz by not knowing her Jewish holidays but I remember starting at ICM years ago and had no clue what the “dirt” some of these people had on their foreheads was. As comical as Rosh Hoshauna sounds to those in the know, don’t we ALL know some in the biz with weirder names than THAT??? I believe we all know the answer…
Hollywood Gentiles haven’t cornered the market in cultural ignorance.
I swear what follows is a true story.
A couple of years ago we were doing a sitcom at one of the big studios. We had a
p.a. who had come through the minority training program, except the program had
been reconfigured after affirmative action was ruled unfair. Therefore, Jeff, our
earnest worker, was a white, Jewish, private school-educated, upper east sider from
New York who slid into the program under the new thinking that it was for people
who might not have otherwise gotten the opportunity.
Two days before our Christmas hiatus, our star suddenly decided he wanted holiday
decorations after having previously announced we weren’t going to have any.
In typical Hollywood can-do spirit, within a short time we had a tree, garlands,
flocking, you name it — in the office and on the stage.
I had been out of the office and walked in to hear all the production bullpen staff
laughing at young Jeff. I asked what was the big joke. Jeff explained he hadn’t
known what tinsel was and everyone was teasing him. I expressed shock. “How
is that possible? How could he not know what tinsel is?” He said he was Jewish,
came from a Jewish neighborhood, went to a largely Jewish school, had never had
a tree, and didn’t grow up with tinsel. I said I had a similar background but
I knew what tinsel was, everyone knows what tinsel is. He was quiet for a moment
and then said, “I still don’t know what tinsel is.” We sat him down,
described the environmentally un-p.c. decoration, and finally went back to work.
The next day he came in with a big grin on his face. He had called his sister who
was away at a pricey east coast college and asked if she knew what tinsel was. “Sure,”
she proudly declared. “It’s that flower you kiss under.”
I’m thinking that this girl is from Alaska and won Ms. Congeniality. She’s going to get real confused by Kwan Zai. Does she realize that her studio is now headed by Indians? And they are not “native Americans”.
I know the young lady who wrote this email, she’s a
development exec working on my next movie, “Rosh Hour 3″
just one jew is right…ryan is a serious DB for spreading this around.
As they say in the South, “Bless her heart.”
This reminds me of the time when I submitted my clients on an Ibsen play and the casting director called to give me appts. The assistant answered the phone then turned to me and asked… “Hey do we represent Hedda Gabler?”
“oh and while I have you, who is this pesky Yom Kippur?”
So I guess this means she won’t be blowing a shofar either?
Even if she were from a small town or the midwest, I’m surprised she didn’t know what Rosh Hashanah was. It’s a well known Jewish holiday.
Of course, in my first job embarrassed myself, too…I was savvy enough to know that Yom Kippur was a Jewish holiday…so to be friendly, I went around to all the Jews in my section to wish them a “Happy Yom Kippur.”
With that said, I was having dinner with a Jewish friend not that long ago who had no idea that you were baptised into Christianity (rather than receiving your Christianity from your mother), so I suppose if you’re not exposed at all to anything to do with another religion you just don’t know.
In reality, Michelle is a very hard worker and was thrown on a very hectic desk her 3rd day on the job. Give her a break.
ReelBusy -
Who doesn’t love Shabbat Shaloming at 2 in the afternoon.
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer. If she didn’t know what Rosh Hashannah is, there is this site called Wikipedia…try it!
Duh!
I grew up in the midwest. Most everyone there was of German/Irish descent. Even at a young age, I knew that Rosh Hashanah was a Jewish holiday. It’s called a calendar, folks. I find it hard to believe this wasn’t a fake.
Then again, most Protestants don’t know what they are “protesting”.
Who cares if she didn’t know. she’s from Puerto Rico. I wouldn’t know her holidays! Also, I think a certain endeavor TV lit agent partner is reprehensible for sending her a nasty email regarding this. What she did was funny not offensive and he should know better than to berate a young asst. who was doing her job and trying to clarify something she didn’t understand.
oh my gosh that is PRICELESS. Print it out and f–ing FRAME it.
My personal discovery in this vein was how to pronounce the word CHALLAH as in CHALLAH bread. I was ordered by The Boss and His Wife (via email) to rustle up some Challah Bread for one of their dinners, but I had never ordered it, eaten it or purchased it before. I had no idea what it looked like or how to pronounce it, so I called a few bakeries in their neighborhood asking for “CHALL-AH” (’ch’ like cherry). One guy demanded to know who was calling, as if I was pulling a prank. Only after I found and delivered the loaves did I discover my ignorance. Oh well, all us non-Jews have to learn somehow.
Watch a typical HBO show and you’ll hear the name of Jesus Christ blasphemed multiple times. I don’t see any posts from Nikki concerned about the faus pas of non-Christians.
This is hysterical, but just one jew is right…because a lot of you mean-spirited mofo’s will actually hold this against her when she seeks employment..”Ryan” is an asshole. She’s probably hot, and this ryan is some twinkee-crumb dribbling whale who couldn’t get laid in a bangkok whorehouse with a hundred dollar bill attached to his cock…
I’m a South Asian Muslim in the middle of a conservative all-white WASP suburb in the midwest and even I know what Rosh Hashanah is.
some people are really dumb.
There are “Gentiles” in Hollywood?!
to Philip, and assuming this is real,
Hopefully Michelle takes the teasing in a spirit of fun. We have ALL had those moments at one time or another when we didn’t know something that “everybody” around us knew.
Um, I grew up in the midwest, went to many seder’s in NE Ohio with girlfriends, and knew Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Purim, and Chanukah.
Just because she is from the Midwest doesn’t give her a pass. It just proves to me that raising your kids in a bubble and not knowing tinsel from mistletoe, or Kwanza from Ramadan is not a way to go through life.
College is about exploring other cultures and gleaning knowledge, if you don’t take advantage of learning about other people YOU SHOULDN’T BE WORKING IN A BUSINESS BASED AROUND COMMUNICATION!
Hell, I’m leaving work now.
Shabot Shalom, Jewish on Holidays.
“So I guess this means she won’t be blowing a shofar either? Comment by Buddy Bing”
No, Buddy. She’ll be blowing a chauffer.
Dear Hollywood and Nikki Finke,
Thanks for this important and earthshaking post.
All the major players, liars and thieves out there and you pick on this poor, young soul. A person just trying to do her job in the best way possible.
I would like to see a public apology by you Nikki Finke to Michelle. A private one would be in order also, but I don’t expect miracles from you.
I’m sure your ‘insiders’ could easily get you in touch with her. Take her to lunch. Do the right thing.
Life is difficult enough, without you beating up on someone like this.
Try to be inclusive, this exclusive club of Hollywood is only being self-defeating by supporting this sort of thing.
Those of us in the ‘fly-over states’ are not as dumb as you think.
http://www.kabbalah.com/roshhashanah_2008
When you celebrate the New Year, try to remember the reasons we all need to work harder at understanding each other.
You ain’t helping the problem.
For those of you who didn’t get the memo we live in a country only federally recognizes Christian holidays. I’m not saying its right, but not everyone knows the holidays of other religions. Perhaps this says something more about our country’s lack of religious education (of all religions) than it does about this poor girl’s judgment. I think she did the right thing by asking a question rather than pretending she knew the answer and continuing to be ignorant. Ryan should be shamed for making this news worthy. And when did we in Hollywood become so rash as to assume everyone should know all Jewish holidays. Do you know all the Muslim holidays?
Seriously, if Michelle really exists, and she or people who know her are reading this: no (sane) Jewish person who’s reading this thinks ill of her because of this.
We all have gaps in our knowledge. Unfortunately, most of those gaps are really boring. Michelle (if she exists) simply had the good luck to have a gap that was really funny.
My own spouse, who was baptized as a Catholic but apparently not well-educated as a Catholic, turned to me one day and asked, “So, who exactly is Jesus? What’s the big deal with him?” So, theological ignorance is a pretty multicultural phenomenon.
OK, this is too funny. But as a Gentile, I was raised to respect and have knowledge of major religions. So I am appalled. How disrespectful!
I talked with Mr. Ram Adan about the matter, and he felt this offense had to be taken up to the next level, so he went to confer with Mr. Jihad. Mr. Jihad thought that it was not worth going to war about, so he sent it back down to the VP of Human Relations, Mr. Fatwa. Mr. Fatwa did indeed find it offensive, and wrote out a memo declaring that Ms. Michelle must take remedial classes in Religion 101 or be stoned.
Peter, Paul and Mary were so incensed that they wrote a song about it. Mr. Hall O’ween was so pleased with Ms. Michelle’s ignorance and spunk that he built a new building on the Fox lot and dedicated it to her.
And then all went out for drinks at Hail Marys…
“Gentiles?” Golly-Gee! And, all this time I thought they were called, “Goys” — Silly me…
So what she didn’t know. I’m Jewish but don’t believe it’s innate or even common knowledge that Rosh Hashanah is the Jewish new Year. It means absolutely nothing that she didn’t know. And how many of you so called such observant Jews can name any of the prayers we say on Rosh Hashana? Leave the girl alone.
Gentiles is the more common use these days. I use goys all the time though…since it’s Yiddish.
Good Shabbas and L’shanah tovah!
Right, enough is enough. This girl happened to be covering a desk in between two of my closest friends in town so when I saw this email it was before it became the latest industry hot-goss du jour. Now don’t get me wrong, I laughed. Hard. But then I immediately felt sorry for her.
I think the reactions to this slight yet embarrassing folly have been disgraceful. Commenters on this site have called her a plethora of unpleasant names and essentially labelled her a moron. I wonder if they could tell me when Diwali is, or Mawlid an-Nabi for that matter. But those religions don’t count really because they’re practised by Indians and Araba and they hardly matter in in this town so screw it. And by the way, Jews account for a little over 1% of the US population and rank 12th in the list of global religions.
Even in this town, a little bit of knowledge can be more dangerous than a lot of ignorance. Give her a break.
Urgh I sound preachy.
Do you want pork with that, Mr. Kosher?
As a Gentile who grew up in 100% gentile towns in the South, this isn’t that shocking to me. There is a difference between dumb and just woefully uneducated.
oy, vay. what a putz.
I’m sure your column was meant in jest. I feel sorry for this kid. Most of the poster’s saying to not know is “disgraceful or ignorant”, just shows their intolerance.
Ryan seems like a total DICK.
Instead of helping out a newbie, he publicly humiliates her.
Nice guy !
He’s the one who should be chastised for his behavior not her.
A new memo has surfaced!!
======================
Will some please explain to my boss that I’m NOT a lesbian! I heard him tell one of his friends that I’m “goy.” I guess that’s how he pronounces “gay,” with his accent.
BTW OMG!!! I heard a rumor than Seinfeld is JEWISH!!! Can you BELIEVE it!!!
Michelle
Oh Goy!
To be fair…how would you know enough to Google RH if you presumed that it was a person.
Not everyone in LA has a jewish friend…yet!
I want to know who posted about Kwanza–has anyone in the business ever taken Kwanza off? Get real.
I do hope to see everyone else at Temple Emanuel. Or at least Temple Manual Arts.
Dear, Wonderful Voodoo — you know how, sometimes, the moment after hit “send,” you say to yourself, “Oh, crap, what I shoulda said was…”? Well, you saw it and said it.
Sarah MICHELLE Palin
I went to private Jewish schools in San Francisco until middle school. My first year in public school, I had the most amazing history teacher: a Jewish man who had survived World War 2 as an adolescent in Eastern Europe. I learned more about the world in his class than I think I did in any other single class before college.
One day he was trying to explain to the class that IQ tests aren’t a very good way of figuring out how smart someone is, because they are based on knowledge rather than the ability to learn. Only, I didn’t know what he was trying to explain because I was busy writing a short story in my notebook and ignoring the lecture. (Yeah, I was one of those kids…)
He called on me and asked, “What is the Holy Trinity?” and I just sat there like a deer caught in headlights. I had NO IDEA.
I reasoned that, since this was an American History class, it was probably a battle of some sort. Holy Trinity sounded like the kind of name they might give something on the East Coast (thought I wasn’t sure why), so I thought that it must have been a battle in some war over there. We hadn’t quite made it to the Civil War period yet, so I figured it must be the Revolutionary War. As I sat there feeling embarrassed for getting caught not paying attention, I knew that I had to give some response, so I answered uncertainly, “A battle in the Revolutionary War?”
Of course, the whole class burst out into uproarious laughter.
My teacher shushed them all, and pointed out that he had known that I wouldn’t know what that was. It was highly unlikely that someone with my experience growing up would know. Then he called on one of the other students to explain the Trinity so that I’d know if it ever came up again.
Michelle may not have known what Rosh Hashana is, but I’m sure she does now!
Do you know many Jews are ignorant about *my* culture?
The girl is young and naive, but that’s kinda the definition of being young. She’s learning. At least she’s asking questions, which is more than I can say for some.
So what was the point of this post? To humiliate someone so you can feel superior to them? Do you think that benefits you, in the long run?
I’m Jewish and I don’t think it’s that bad.
I have a higher opinion of Michelle than I have of the people who keep posting ’she should meet my friend Yom Kippur!!!!1!! LOLZ!’ on here despite the fact that seventeen people have already done that gag.
Shalom!