Look at U.S. District Judge Robert Kugler’s decision in Delaware yesterday on Universal’s motion to dismiss in the Redbox case. (He granted it in part, and denied it in part. The Hollywood studios lined up against Redbox aren’t happy that the court allowed Redbox’s antitrust claims to continue, but threw out its copyright misuse and tortious interference claims.)
But never mind the law or the decision itself. Look at the self indulgent writing. Yes, license like this is taken often. Things must get boring when trying dry corporate cases. So this judge sprinkled his decision with a bunch of bad puns using movie titles. (Makes you wonder how seriously he took this.) For example: “Redbox maintains that Universal has otherwise failed to ‘Do the Right Thing’ in seeking to prevent Redbox from buying new release Universal DVDs from other wholesalers and retailers, and in some cases succeeding in those attempts. With the ‘Mercury Rising’ in the relationship between Redbox and Universal, Redbox employees turned to a ‘Cloak and Dagger’ exercise, visiting Wal-Mart and Best Buy stores in an attempt to purchase multiple copies of Universal DVDs.” Other new and old movie titles used are Duplicity, To Kill A Mockingbird, Hamlet, Great Expectations, Counselor At Law, The ‘Burbs, The Fast And The Furious, Legal Eagles, Two For The Money, The Real McCoy, Two For The Money, Brüno, Raising Cain. What is it about Hollywood that makes everyone who comes within 5,000 miles of the place lose IQ points?
Editor-in-Chief Nikki Finke - tip her here.


Judge Dreddful
In most instances, these decisions are written entirely by Judicial Clerks which come in two varieties. One is a current law student or recent grad; the other is full-time clerks who have chosen clerkship pergagory over a traditional legal career (a track that can lead to entry level magistrate positions, and eventually – for the lucky ones – a position somewhere on the state bench).
Point is… I would bet that this judge skimmed over the opinion written by his clerk, rubber stamped it as judges often do. That doesn’t excuse the cavalier treatment of a very important and business-altering decision. My desire to believe that federal judges are smarter than this leads me to believe this is the work of a clerk. I sure hope so.
he should fax some jokes to jimmy fallon. those aren’t any worse than his monologues.
I think the judge wanted to SNATCH a HALF-BAKED joke from the JAWS of the sort of WHITE NOISE used by LEGAL EAGLES in deciding a case involving THE BREAK UP of the relationship between these companies. He thinks he’s one of the FUNNY PEOPLE, but it just makes him look like a 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN.
Damn that was bad.
There are a bunch of judges who do this regularly. It’s kind of silly, but nobody in the legal community seems to mind, I guess since it cuts the boredom of reading legalese. Anyway, I don’t think it’s a reaction to the Hollywood aspect of the decision as you suggest.
Judges get bored, too. Especially in Delaware.
A U.S. District Judge has two law clerks who write his opinions for him. He is an idiot for signing off on it, but for all we know, the clerk wrote it as an internal joke, expecting it to be sent back for cleaning up, and the judge either didn’t realize it was a joke, thought it was cute or (highly likely — and scary to know that this happens more often than not) signed it without reading it. A lot of law that is created by judges in this case is actually written (and sometimes even slightly altered in the process) by 25-30 year olds just out of law school. A judge wouldn’t put in the time to find all of those references, and would have no idea what “The Fast and the Furious” was.
Actually, Nikki, this is a common thing that some judges do from time to time, not just in cases involving Hollywood but elsewhere. If you go to law school you’ll find all the goofy cases – like the one about an accident where somebody drove their car into a tree that was written in verse to sound like the famous Joyce Kilmer poem about a tree. Judges have boring jobs most of the time so it’s kind of mean spirited to blame them when they try to liven things up a little once in awhile. At least it makes the opinion somewhat interesting to read, instead of bone dry like most legal opinions.
What’s your problem? Let a judge write what he wants. Thats the beauty of being a judge.
This judge reminds me a little too much of Horatio Sanz’ SNL impression of Gene Shalit.
here I was thinking it would take 10-15 years for the setting in Idiocracy to become reality…I guess you could say I’m a glass half full kind of guy
I’m just impressed that someone remembers the movie Cloak & Dagger! Must be a gen-x gamer.
Hey do us a favor & post the judges ruling in its entirety, please? I want to read the rationale for the partial dismissal and the partial denial of the dismissal for myself, thanks.
Also the young attorneys who clerk for federal judges while they may be humor impaired usually had the best grades in law school. They often go on to plum positions in law firms, politics or even on the federal bench.
This is definitely not some of the cleverest punning I’ve ever seen in an opinion but it’s not the worst.
I think Kosinski (sp?) on the 9th Circuit does this kinda stuff all the time in his opinions.
Nikki don’t Panic Room. I don’t want to William Hurt you.
To quote the late great Peter Cook:” I’d rather be a judge than a coal miner. Because when a miner is old and feeble-minded, he loses his job. A judge, on the other hand…”
I believe the judge has now been hired to write the script for the next Apatow movie.
What?! How dare this Drudgebot fascist judge talk about Our Industry? Only WE get to talk about Our Industry! And by WE I mean any warm body within driving distance of the Arclight! Not some slack-jawed Flyover Country hick! Do something about this, Nikki!
They’re just adjusting their IQ to match Hollywood.