TUESDAY AM UPDATE: First, you should know that Jeff Berg and his new Resolution Agency colleagues thought this caption contest was hilarious. Like, duh, they know how old they are. They also know that they’re wiser and richer and badder than all you wusses who complained it was ageist. That said, I’d advise the four to hire a good stylist - geez, any stylist – next time their photo is taken. As for the contest itself, the captions were so effing funny I laughed until I cried. (Why can’t SNL hire you Borscht Belt comics?) And the winners are:

FIRST PLACE
Disney wonders how it will break it to the original Star Wars actors that they won’t be in Episode 7.

SECOND PLACE
We’re the four guys who believe McG can actually tell a story.

THIRD PLACE
“Dear Gentlemen, Thank you for your interest in Kappa Alpha. We regret to inform you that we have no interest in sponsoring you at Adams. In the future we recommend you not include a group photo.”

HONORABLE MENTION
The first thing they resolved is the age-old question: Jerry’s Deli, or Cantors???

Asked about competing with younger agents, Berg said, “What? I can’t hear you. Please speak louder.”

Resolution’s first order of business was an attempt to put the gay rumors to rest. Yes, it turns out, they all use Ben Gay.

FRIDAY 10 PM: A rival tenpercentery sent over this authentic photo of the brand new Resolution Agency together at Pollstar Live! for the ”Meet The Agents” networking session with most of the concert promoters from the U.S. and abroad gathered there Thursday afternoon. (L-R: Jeff Berg, Jeff Franklin, Steve Schenck, Terry Rhodes.) I’m speechless. You’re not. So I’ll name the Top 3 winners on Monday Tuesday for this latest Deadline Caption Contest which we post from time to time:

Editor-in-Chief Nikki Finke - tip her here.