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UPDATES Rights To 'Terminator' Franchise For Sale
An Open Letter to the Terminator Owners. From a Very Important Hollywood Mogul
Dear Sirs/Ma'ams,
I am Joss Whedon, the mastermind behind Titan A.E., Parenthood (not the movie) (or the new series) (or the one where 'hood' was capitalized 'cause it was a pun), and myriad other legendary tales. I have heard through the 'grapevine' that the Terminator franchise is for sale, and I am prepared to make a pre-emptive bid RIGHT NOW to wrap this dealio up. This is not a joke, this is not a scam, this is not available on TV. I will write a check TODAY for $10,000, and viola! Terminator off your hands.
No, you didn't miscount. That's four -- FOUR! -- zeroes after that one. That's to show you I mean business. And I mean show business. Nikki Finke says the Terminator concept is played. Well, here's what I have to say to Nikki Finke: you are a fine journalist and please don't ever notice me. The Terminator story is as formative and important in our culture -- and my pretend play -- as any I can think of. It's far from over. And before you Terminator-Owners (I have trouble remembering names) rush to cash that sweet cheque, let me give you a taste of what I could do with that franchise:
1) Terminator... of the Rings! Yeah, what if he time-travelled TOO far... back to when there was dragons and wizards? (I think it was the Dark Ages.) Hasta La Vista, Boramir! Cool, huh? "Now you gonna be Gandalf the Red!" RRRRIP! But then he totally helps, because he's a cyborg and he doesn't give a s#&% about the ring -- it has no power over him! And he can carry it AND Frodo AND Sam AND f@%& up some orcs while he's doing it. This stuff just comes to me. I mean it. (I will also offer $10,000 for the Lord of the Rings franchise).
2) More Glau. Hey. There's a reason they're called "Summer" movies.
3) Can you say... musical? Well don't. Even I know that's an awful idea.
4) Christian Bale's John Connor will get a throat lozenge. This will also help his Batwork (ten grand for that franchise too, btw.)
5) More porn. John Connor never told Kyle Reese this, but his main objective in going to the past was to get some. What if there's a lot of future-babies that have to be made? Cue wah-wah pedal guitar -- and dollar signs!
6) The movies will stop getting less cool.
Okay. There's more -- this brain don't quit! (though it has occasionally been fired) -- but I think you get my drift. I really believe the Terminator franchise has only begun to plumb the depths of questioning the human condition during awesome stunts, and I'd like to shepherd it through the next phase. The money is there, but more importantly, the heart is there. But more importantly, money. Think about it. End this bloody bidding war before it begins, and put the Terminator in the hands of someone who watched the first one more than any other movie in college, including "Song of Norway" (no current franchise offer).
Sincerely, Joss Whedon.
Loading ...
$11,000 here. Going, going…
Joss Whedon’s “Terminator” would be awesome. I kind of wish there was some studio, some financing entity, some “something” behind Whedon’s push to make it a reality. I’d been kind of half-laughing at the idea of the value of the “Terminator” license, but if anyone in Hollywood would do a re-launch justice, well, it’s a guy like Whedon.
I don’t care who gets it, as long as it isn’t Michael Bay.
Hell, let Uwe Boll have it.
Bay would at least do a half decent job than most, and far better than Whedon. Remember McG was claiming T4 would be the big summer movie? FOX should get Cameron the rights and go with him. Though I’m sure he’s past this.
Mommy – is there really a T4 ?
Sorry are you just an idiot. Bay better than Whedon?? I can’t even begin to tell you where you’re wrong there.
We’ll just leave it on Bay is a moron who wouldn’t know how to make a good movie even if a transformer personally delivered him the best script ever devised
Bay better than Whedon?
Yeah, you’re an idiot.
Bay would just make more explosions and such.. at least whedon would have a good story to go along with the awesome action..
Hell, let Merchant-Ivory have it.
Can you imagine a Merchant-Ivory Terminator movie? A Room With a View … of the Apocalypse.
I’d rather have Song of Norway.
that sounds sincere.
(love the lozenge)
A Terminator franchise with a supremely talented writer/mastermind at the helm? That’d never work… Guy can’t even fly under Nikki Finke’s radar.
Get that man to a typewriter and get out of the way! That’s your winning bid, hands down!
‘hahaha’/sarcasm. It’s obvious every terminator project post-Cameron has been very mediocre, but that doesn’t mean that terminator 1+2 are not 100x more significant than anything joss whedon will ever put together. plus, if anyone looks at the way warfare tech is going (e.g. drones, e.g. unmanned and increasingly autonomous weapons systems), it is not hard to see that the first two pictures and even the other film/tv/videogame projects end up being conversant with present day war/tech paradigm shifts in a way that garbage like ‘dollhouse’ isn’t.
Of course, even this tongue-in-cheek letter is 1000000x more significant than anything creative you’ll ever do.
Sour grapes make for great vinegar. Give Heinz a call, you could make them a deal.
That’s quite the lame put down Luzid…you must be one of Joss Whedon’s writers.
It’s okay, Little Mike. Let me dry your tear-stained cheeks. Now tell me: how did Joss Whedon hurt you?
In case you have forgotten, Joss Whedon wrote the original Oscar nominated screenplay (the only writer of the first draft, not the final product) for Toy Story which is one of the most significant films of the last 25 years. Not only the first fully computer animated film, but a good film on its own merits and launched Pixar as a movie powerhouse with a nearly flawless record. I would argue that it was more significant than any Terminator movie.
Now, I love T1 & T2, with T2 the better movie, but T1 having the better time travel scenario. I’ve never seen Dollhouse, T3 or T4, so I cannot comment on those.
Actually, he co-wrote it with like 5 other people. Maybe he was the genius behind it, I don’t know.
i don’t dislike joss whedon, but admittedly not his biggest fan. i respect his niche and all, but this is pretty tacky. while it’s all well and good to criticize the most recent owners of the rights, this still seems to jab at t1 and t2, and that can’t fly. if he’s knocking sarah connor chronicles and the most recent mcg garbage that’s all gravy, but t1 and t2 is better than any buffy episode.
Um..he’s not knocking t:scc at all – he’s a huge fan of that show. Actually I think if you asked him privately he’d probably tell you that he would have preferred terminator getting a renewal over dollhouse. Maybe if you did your homework you’d know that. Are you blindly making statements about t1/t2 being better then buffy too? Or have you actually seen the genius of that show and are just too dumb to realize it?
I think you’re underestimating the power of the Buffy series. Maybe for those people over the age of twenty when it aired it was just another vampire show, but for some of us it was a coming of age drama about the fragility of the human existence. I’m also a big terminator fan and attempting to compare the two tales is just ludicrous. It’s apples and oranges people, so stop with the my producers dick is bigger than your producers dick already!
In no way is he dispraging T1 or T2. He worships those films, as he makes pretty clear in this letter. Reading comprehension, people.
Mike, with respect, I think you are reading *way* too much into Whedon’s comments. Of course he loves T1 & T2. How could he not? Why would he even bother to try to buy the franchise if he hated the movies so much? His sarcasm is clearly aimed at the post-James Cameron projects.
And if you were talking about the people behind “Charmed” or “Andromeda,” I would say, yes, T1 & T2 are 100x more significant. But the man behind “Buffy” and “Angel”? Now that’s an important pedigree. Have a friend show you some hand-picked great episodes. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.
As for me, I’m all for Summer Glau making a comeback. Bring on the hottest Terminator on the planet!
Genius. I usually don’t dig a lot of Mr.Whedon’s stuff, but this is clever, hilarious and charming. They should just give him the rights and let him rescue the franchise from the depths of mediocrity the last two movies dragged it into. For free, as a penalty.
Gotta give Whedon some credit. At least he’s offering what it’s worth.
Sony won’t be able to say that.
Makes perfect sense. Start with a concept you know has a good chance of being cancelled, so you don’t have to slog through seasons and seasons of an enjoyable show. You had trouble there with some of your early series, but now you’re getting the hang of it.
Let me know when he offers for the Twilight Saga. Maybe we can watch Felicia Day stake some melodramatic glittery vamps.
Never! He would never stoop to a story as low brown and poorly written as that.
Or even “a story as lowbrow and poorly written as that.”
I can see it now: Twilight: THE MUSICAL!!!
Dayum, I might even see that.
That would possibly be the best thing ever. Felicia Day staking those “vampires”.
I’ll throw a hundred bucks onto Mr. Whedon’s offer and sweeten the pot, bringing the bid to an epic $10100! That’s twenty in binary! How can you say no to that?
In all seriousness, with the possible exception of James Cameron, no one on Earth is more qualified to reinvigorate the beloved Terminator franchise than
The MasterJoss Whedon. As an unrepentantly obsessive Terminator fan (google my name along with either “Terminator” or “endoskeleton” and the results will speak for themselves) as well as a fan of everything that Whedon has ever done, touched, or looked at funny (yes, that includes the original “Buffy” movie), putting Whedon and Terminator together would, IMHO, be cinematic nirvana. I honestly can’t conceive of a movie that I’d want to see more than a Terminator flick with Joss at the helm. I know that Joss’ financial offer is tongue-in-cheek, but I sincerely hope that whoever ends up with the rights to The Terminator gives serious consideration to bringing Whedon on board with any future Terminator projects, be they TV, movies, or even comics.And, no joke, I really would happily sell a kidney to help make it happen.
Joss forgot to mention the possibility of crossing over with The Passion of the Christ. MadTv already did the trailer for that one
(YouTube link at the signature)
I love this business
Also, of course, there can be >i> Terminator: Avatar’s Resurrection , which continues the adventures of cybernetic Marcus, played by Sam Worthington… who re-awakens on a strange planet, and…
… no, wait, we already have done that.
Seriously, though. This and the last couple of casting choices show definitely a potential to do ALL franchises together.
As we all know Pavel Chekov was caught in a time experiment that thrust him from Star Trek: Back To The Future into the wastelands of 21st century Earth, where he – without the possibility to return to his own time – lived under the name Kyle Reese and became the father of none other than Batman…
(I so totally wanted Christian Bale to answer the question of “Who are you?” with “I’m Batman” in T4. “You thought I was John Connor, didn’t you? Well, I am Bruce F**CKING Wayne!”)
…while in a different part of the galaxy Lt. Uhura found herself in the body of a native alien lifeform that…
… in the meantime, Kirk’s daddy, finding himself in Valhalla after his unfortunate demise is being told by none other than Hannibal Lecter that he is the God of Thunder, but hell, who is going to believe Hannibal, eh?
YOU’RE AMAZING
Oh dear God, please let them take the cheque.
Hilarious, regardless of how much sincerity is here on Joss’s part. If he’s just pointing out that the Terminator franchise has and could continue to do very well as a business, point made. If he’s commenting on how much further the storyline can go, I concede that a good writer could take this quite far. And if his is a serious offer, I’m sure that I and every other fanboy and fangirl would thrill to see it happen.
But again, funny no matter what.
Oh, good lord, No! ‘Dollhouse’ sucks. And a ‘Terminator’ movie with his verbose-geek style would massively suck.
As an attempt at humor this is painfully lame and unfunny…My advice to Josh: spend more time writing for your show “Dollhouse” and maybe it won’t suck as bad as it does…or did they cancel that one already?
It’s “Joss” not “Josh” there smarty pants.
It’s Joss, you fucking idiot. Not Josh.
Dude. How can you give advice if you can’t even spell his name correctly. Jeez.
Poor trolling attempt. To get the Whedon fans ACTUALLY riled up, you must also disrespect Firefly and Buffy.
Seriously, try harder. I’m a Whedon Fanatic, and that comment made my eyes roll.
No! Do not give this man free publicity!
But there is no reason not to sell him this franchise. Just look at what he did with Alien 4.
Okay. That’s not a very nice thing to say about someone beloved of so many. Especially me.
But let’s face it. This man could take over pretty much any licensed property and we’d all sit around with baited breath, waiting to see if his backers actually got out of his way long enough to let him be Joss Whedon.
(He might be required to say nice things about Fox, but *I’m* not.)
To be fair. Joss Whedon’s version of Alien 4 was never created. He dropped out after writing the first draft when the producers and directors changed basically everything and made a mockery of his ideas.
We saw what happened last time that happened, Buffy the Vampire Slayer the film was made. When Joss finally got back in control, the series was made and a severe difference in quality could be observed by all
Now *that* is funny.
A while back I reached out and asked the (3 or so) lonely souls who had nothing to do but chase Dollhouse through it’s scheduling game of hide-and-seek, why they bothered tuning in. What I got were close to 500 testimonials of multi-paragraph, well thought-out discourses on the need for existential quests in scripted TV. Unsurprisingly, the #1 reason listed for watching was (you guessed it) Joss Whedon. The man can write. He can spin a tale. He can make a grocery list that punches your insides and causes you to bawl your eyes out when he butchers the carrots.
I doubt that the Terminator owners will be so brave as to hand him the keys to their franchise. Then someone might notice dialogue, plot, or character development, and that takes precious attention away from the big explosions.
Nonetheless, if you want to see how the world ends or what happens in a dystopian future, there’s another little show that is currently dying a slow death of network neglect. It lacks robots, but hey, it has dolls! It’s on some Friday or other (but not this coming one, try December).
I know for certain that there are AT LEAST six Dollhouse fans. They include me and my dog.
“I will write a check TODAY for $10,000, and viola! Terminator off your hands.”
Viola! LOL. Tres drolle monsieur Whedon. Voila!
Psst, it’s Drôle , btw
Joss Whedon has a wonderful sense of humor. All kidding aside though, I think he’d do an amazing job with the franchise.
If Joss wants to breathe life into Terminator, then my frakking gorram goodness let him do it!! That would be amazing and made of win. I’m just saying.
Wheadon wants to breathe life into Terminator? Just like he did with Alien 4? Breathe into my ass Josh, that movie and this article sucked big time.
Please see above
Well if he actually wrote that then his writing is even more lame than I thought. (Please tell me someone else submitted it as a joke. It’s not always obvious in this town what is sincerely funny and what is inadvertently funny.)
The only person who should ever be allowed to have his sweaty little hands on Terminator anything is Josh Friedman, one of the few real thinkers around.
Oh yeah, Joss could do amazing things with the Terminator franchise. There’s so much to build on and he can spin quite a tale.
Plus, I wouldn’t be too quick to write off the musical idea… musical porn with elves and killer robots sounds like it could be pretty captivating.
Who wants to chip in with me to raise another 1-followed-by-four-zeroes worth of bills to pay terminator producers do the HONOR of having someone such as joss (not JOSH you mother frakkers) touch their failing franchise.
Whedon has a sense of humor about himself, that’s very endearing in my book.
I bid $10,001
My god, the nerds have invaded this comment section.
Rather, you are invading the domain of the nerds. I mean, just read the title of the page.
I would see a Terminator musical. Just sayin’…
If only he had put this much effort in the writing of Dullhouse.
They’ll never sell it to Joss because he’d makes something awesome and they’d look like schmoes. It would be, at the very least, as good as Alien 4, as mentioned (I kid!).
If he misses out on this or LOTR, maybe he can focus his sights on something higher like the rights to Team Knight Rider or Condorman.
Funny on Whedon….but the fan reaction (as realized on a couple of influential corners of the internet) to McG’s movie was worse and more calculated with ill will and cynicism than anything in the latest movie imo.
That said, not having Cameron hold the reins on this stuff is patently absurd and we’ve all seen the results.
For me, Terminator 3 is at Universal Studios – - and the McG one is kind of a massive budget piece of fan fiction – which is better than the Mostow one that got crapped out but less than the property deserves.
My advice to andrew: If you can’t get the man’s name right despite it being plastered all over the very item to which you are responding, your opinion means squat.
Just sayin’.
And now that Joss’ celebration of high-tech date rape has been canceled by Fox, he’ll have lots of time to devote to Terminator.
Meh. Lorne Michaels did the insultingly-low-offer joke thirty years ago, when he went on SNL to offer the ex-Beatles three thousand dollars (”You can give less to Ringo”) for reuniting on the show. I don’t know if Joss thinks that this is funny, or if he’s trying to imitate some painfully unfunny fan of his. Either way, meh.
Whedon knows how to squeeze humour, horror, heart and boom-booms out of pretty much any situation/genre. He’s hell-bent on giving female leads their (much-deserved) chance to be heroic and fallible instead of reducing them to Megan Fox fembots. He weaves wonderful plotlines and knows how to write excellent dialogue (a skill sorely lacking in 90 percent of summer blockbusters).
I’d imagine he could do another time-jump plotline. Bring Sarah Connor back (he rivals Cameron in ability to deliver kick-ass female warrior-women). Make John less jerky and more, I dunno, human. OK Arnie’s a near-definite no-go but bring a charismatic walking tree-trunk in as a replacement.
Whedon’s been shackled by Fox-drones for too long. He’s been beaten down by their incessant meddling, flipflop decision-making and itchy trigger fingers. Universal need a big franchise, and Whedon delivered a solid, if not hugely profitable, movie debut with Serenity (I personally loved it but apparently it just slipped under most cinema-goers’ radars). Maybe Uni will dip into their pockets and splash out on a Whedon-helmed trilogy of awesomeness.
(Although the odds are probably mirroring the odds of Serenity II. Ah well.)
And they call me crazy.
Terminator is dead. They cannot make one good video game off of a twenty plus year old film series. Where’s the market?
Terminator three was interesting. At least you had something good to look at even if she wanted to kill you. The blood licking was intense.
Terminator four wasn’t that bad, the ending sucked, but the beginning act was very interesting. Bring back the hot chick as a terminator killer.
But since this would be the fifth film, and Christian Bale won’t be back (TAKE THAT Imdb.com). Let’s see batman verses Terminator five verses Pablo in 2011. I see two of these films making it to a green light for 2012 or a late 2011 release.
So please Jr. Steven berg, I wouldn’t sell any of my scripts or plays for less than the 2006 WGA requirement of 36k. So a fing franchise that’s probably dead should at the minimum go for 100 million (Sony)
Why don’t you make another Buffy movie, or better yet a Roseanne with all the kids returning home doing the 2012 depression.
Other then that I still love and respect you, despite that rant. Loved Firefly. Call me.
write a check TODAY for $10,000, and viola!
He takes a great risk in assuming the current franchise owners share his passion for large stringed instruments.
“I’ll be Bach”!
Wow, good catch! And very clever…
Just kill this terrible franchise already. Who cares?! It’s been done to death and Terminator Salvation was unwatchable. Unless Arnold is coming back to kick some butt, kill this franchise.
I think it’s pretty clearly a spoof of when Lorne Michaels offered The Beatles $3000 to appear on SNL.
And maybe Joss will bring his magic touch to the Terminator franchise and the next Terminator movie will make $24 million at the U.S. box office like Serenity did.
At least it’ll have an actual plot that’s good.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Hilarious!
Throw some of that funny into “Dollhouse” (which takes itself & its misogyny way too seriously) & maybe it won’t have to go on “hiatus” again.
Even funnier? Whedon’s is probably the best offer the “Terminator” owners are going to get!
Hilarious, it sounds so much like a speech Doctor Horrible could say in his blog… wait a minute…
God, why does this unfunny guy get a free pass? He’s been doing the phony self-deprecating thing for 15 years now. And this whole bit is a rip off of the Lorne Michaels “Beatles” pitch.
Joss, your humor ‘works’ with goth girls only (because they have no sense of humor). Go back to playing with your Dolls where you aren’t bothering the rest of us.
Last I checked I’m not goth and I’m pretty sure I have the wrong parts to be a girl, and I found it hilarious. Maybe it’s funny only to those of us who don’t have a stick up… never mind.
You tell ‘em Jase.
If you’re trashing Joss, why is your name “Whedonesquer”?
I find it telling that pretty much every critical comment of Joss here, even the ones that are innocuous, is followed by at least a couple insults directed at the commenter who dared write something unflattering about Joss. That tells me more about the man and his cronies than this bland attempt at humor.
I find that this gross overreaction to an innocuous question indicates the sort of mental instability these detractors (or maybe just you) posses.
I agree with Mike. DOLLHOUSE’s major narrative failing is its inability to be “conversant with the present day war/tech paradigm shifts.” I hope Whedon and company take this lesson to heart, and begin conversing more thoroughly with their tech/war paradigms, both pre- and post-shiftiness.
Why no link to the original source of this letter, at whedonesque.com? Whedon himself linked to the news article, but his actual post is at http://whedonesque.com/comments/22240 . Posting it here without a source or explanation suggests that Whedon sent the letter to you to make public, which is extremely misleading and unprofessional. Please consider updating to add the original post link.
I’m pretty sure he DID send her the letter to make public… I promise you that Nikki does not troll Whedonesque in an attempt to find something newsworthy to post… and like you said, Joss HIMSELF linked to this – how can you possibly take offense where he takes none?
I’ll raise the bid to $15,000 and I’ll even throw in a nice coffee mug for free. Or a cute ferret, whichever the seller prefers.
Dear Terminator owners,
PLEASE accept this offer: it’s the best occasion ever to make Terminator reach unspeakably awesome heights.
As long as this doesn’t prevent Joss from working on his other extremely cool TV series: Dollhouse!
$11,001.
Your move, Whedon.
W
I’ll give you $10,000 to take Whedon off your hands, and Viola too!
(Shakespeare in Love)
No amount of money can buy Nikki Finke! Right Nikki????
Joss Whedon seems like a reasonably likable guy and I’ve enjoyed some of his work a great deal. But he comes off as kind of a douche in this letter (and not nearly as clever as he thinks). Granted, T3 and T4 were nowhere near the seminal works that Cameron’s movies were, but I think both are far superior to Whedon’s sci-fi movie work. I mean, have you seen SERENITY?!
Yes. I have seen Serenity – many, MANY times. It is a GREAT film, and better than 99% of the junk that passes for sci-fi in hollywood today. I wish he was serious here, because I would LOVE to see Whedon take on Terminator (and cast Nathan Fillion as Kyle Reese!)
We already know he’d keep Summer Glau (Firefly/Sarah Connor Chronicles) in it!
There’s a certain holier-than-thou attitude that kind of permeates all of this guy’s work, right down to this letter. (Which as the other poster said is a dead-on lift from Lorne Michaels’ famous Beatles plea — same setup and same payoff.)
His considerable talent as a writer, on display even in the above one-off, earned him a clear-cut fanbase, and you look at the Dollhouse numbers and know exactly how many “hard core” followers he has. But you kind of wish the guy did stuff that was a bit more unexpected and well considered.
Holier-than-thou? Really? … (pondering) …
I don’t see it, frankly.
Have you considered, perhaps, that it’s really you who are ‘holier than thou’? Seriously: there’s this psychological concept known as projection. (You could look it up.)
No, actually the numbers of Dollhouse don’t really represent the number of his fans. I love his other work, but couldn’t sit through a single complete episode of Dollhouse. Why he insists on working with Eliza Dushku is beyond me, but that’s not the only problem. The show is just a “miss,” as far as quality goes. Even the great ones have them.
Sure I have, and I found it significantly better than the last two Terminator films, as did most people. To wit:
Serenity: 81 percent fresh at Rotten Tomatoes, 74 rating at metacritic, 8.0 user rating at imdb.
Terminator Salvation: 32 percent fresh at Rotten Tomatoes, 52 rating at metacritic, 7.0 user rating at imdb.
Terminator – Rise Of The Machines: 70 percent fresh at Rotten Tomatoes, 66 rating at metacritic, 6.6 user rating at imdb.
Joss, how about trying to make “Dollhouse” good first?
I’ve watched every episode of “Dollhouse” thus far (loved Buffy, Angel, and Firefly) and have been waiting for it to even get near “Sara Connor Chronicles” quality.
Do me a favor? Spend less time writing quasi-funny letters on the internet about Terminator and your new episode of “Glee” and get back to fixing the show that will forever be the albatross around your neck.
Big fan, though. Seriously.
-Kyle Shelton
The Dollhouse Chronicles? PASS.
Serenity was damn good, especially if you were a fan of the television show, not sure what you’re point is. T3 and T4 were just horrid.
I’d pay real money to hear Arnold’s Terminator say:
“Let’s be bad guys.”
Obviously this is a joke and Whedon knows he’s not right for Terminator. It would be far more disastrous than McG’s effort if Whedon ever got hold of the rights and made his own movie. Terminator is dark, gritty, NOT funny (excepting of course a few moments in each film). Terminator is not just a geek thing, like Buffy. I’m a HUGE fan of Whedon’s work… But look at it this way. I like HP Lovecraft, and I also like JK Rowling… But I wouldn’t expect Rowling to be able to write a great Cthulhu Mythos story (or maybe she could). It’s just different styles, is my point. Whedon’s geeky banter and style would ruin the feel of the whole thing.
I vote we give Joss Whedon a big try – just think!
- more beautiful Terminators that function as prostitutes, but we ‘just won’t call them that.’ Like in Doll House!!
He’d reallllllllly show Jim Cameron how to write a REAL woman’s role: glam’ her up, show lots of skin, and have her flop on her back every 40 minutes. Naturally, whoever plays the part of the new Terminatrix will be stalking men in stiletto heels, Max Factor High Blush #9, and the new Mother-Of-Pearl Maybelline Lipgloss.
Go, Joss, Go!!!!
If, by some chance, you actually do acquire it, don’t let Fox s**t all over it like they did Firefly. Please, sign up with the Sci-Fi network or something. Anyone. Just not Fox.
Amen to this.
Indeed.. Fox = shit.. they wouldn’t know a good show if it bit them in the ass.. if he were to actually do this, on TV it would have to go to Syfy (screw all the NBCs, ABCs, FOXs, CBSs of the world).. as far as movies.. so long as he keeps it.. dark.. i’m good.. i couldn’t handle a terminator movie with as much geeky comedy as i get outa buffy and all his other stuff.. while i enjoy that humor, it just wouldn’t fit in..
Kill it.
Now.
Joss can write characters, but his run on Astonishing X-men was one of the most boring, and overhyped comic book arcs that I can remember. Great set pieces still get the blood pumping and he couldn’t come up with one to save his life, which makes him an awful choice to take over the Terminator franchise. And why are we even talking about this make-believe scenario? I feel for his writing staff that has to sit around the table and fake laugh while he reads them this letter.
I think we should pull down the letter and take a year to make a 3d version. Put it back up and see if it’s funnier.
josh is hysterical, hopefully he’ll get the keys to BUCK ROGERS and not THE TERMINATOR. I love him, but TERMINATOR is a straight-ahead action-adventure, making it snarky and self-aware is non-sci-fi geeks trying to make the franchise more “palatable”… thus we get fembot terminators and lonely robots with human hearts. Keep it pure. Keep it sci fi.
Gave me a chuckle since Joss indirectly helped get Sarah Connor Chronicles canceled since Fox owed him for Firefly and gave Dollhouse another season instead of SCC. With Summer Glau freed up then she goes over to Dollhouse bring the fanboys and girls over to that show.
It’s all a conspiracy man….
@ Doug B: Are you still on that one? Everyone knows that T:SCC got cancelled because Fox are buttpipes who wouldn’t know good TV if it shot them in the face. And because it was way more expensive to make than Dollhouse. And because Joss agreed to cut costs in many ways. I loved that show (even during 3 dots!) and really wanted a third season (why aren’t more shows doing straight to DVD stuff? Seriously, I would eat that up!) but don’t keep whining on about it being Joss’s fault it got cancelled.
T:SCC had poor ratings in S1 got an S2 then got cancelled.
Dollhouse had poor rating in S1 got an S2, which got no real advertising and then hauled off during sweeps, and then shown back to back during December (party month)….what do we expect?
You forgot to mention the ever present Black helicopters with their
blood-thirsty strike teams or the insidious flouridation
conspirators.
Just what an ailing franchise needs; a niche writer who banked on a pair of convoluted IPs and remains on television because a vapid fan base blows up executive’s e-mail boxes. I mean, we should look past the ratings failures like Dollhouse and Firefly as well as his celluloid flop Serenity because his ‘work’ details coming of age topics which make college age students and grant sucking failures in universities wet.
I’m sorry Joss. It sucks to be the guy making television in a post David Chase/Shawn Ryan world. It also sucked when folks like Donald Bellisario come up with more convincing and better situated characters than those contained within any of your two dimensional series’s.
Yeah, the last two Terminator films weren’t exactly all that great. But you somehow managed to scrape by the cutting room floor when Fox had to cancel one of their sci-fi creations.
Shouldn’t your kind be writing slop for the SyFy channel?
Isn’t it awesome that you keep bread on the tables of actors who would be better served delivering pizzas from some chain in SoCal?
Let’s face it, dog, you’re Michael Cimino and you don’t even have the Deer Hunter to bank on. Stop acting like you’re the modern age Orson Welles and write something beside your tired ‘girl-power’ trash.
Until you do? Those of us who like ‘good’ things will sit in the corner and continue to act like you do not exist.
ooo look at me.. i can throw names around like i’m some sort of film buff or have a doctorate in creative writing when nobody really values my opinion anyway.. go back to drinking your starbucks and talking about your bullshit philosophy somewhere else..
oh.. and have a WONDERFUL day..
See what you did Nikki. You pressed the Joss Whedon Button, and here they came. You ma’am are a great sensationlist journalist
TOLDJA!
Have fun kids
James Cameron should buy the rights to let it die in peace.
That was a surprisingly funny letter from Whedon, I dont care much for his work but for this I’ll make an exception.
Umm..after Alien Resurrection I think I’d hope Joss stays away from sequels. That said, it couldn’t be worse than salvation!
This is hilarious and I am sending the link all around my office
The Lorne Michaels tribute was deliberate as you would see if you saw the comments and Joss’s reply over on Whedonesque.
Brilliant! lol
Wait … no Terminator The Musical? Joss knows how to rock a musical. I think he could do it.
Stick a fork in it.
Wonder if this post will make it.
Says the tool who wrote Alien 4. What a hypocrite.
great just what the terminator franchise needs
“BUFFY THE TERMINATOR DOLLHOUSEFLY SLAYER”
C’mon everybody, the way to prolong the Terminator franchise is to start over again at the beginning, “re-imagine” it with updated themes and metaphors as was done with Battlestar Galactica.
The central story can be told to a new generation without carrying over all the baggage of the previous installments.
California on the brink of disaster, not from nuclear war, but from economic collapse.
John Connor, not a resistance fighter, but a charismatic leader with humanitarian instincts whose work ushers in an era of peace and prosperity.
The villans, people who profit from the misery of the public and see their dominance undone by Connor’s rise, decide to travel back in time and eliminate him.
The story would feel familiar, but be just different enough to make you want more.
The shit would write itself.
Termy The Vampire Slayer? Hmmmm.
I’m just sayin’.
I dont care who does it, but get Summer Glau back on film… TV or Movie(s)… does not matter to me. She is soooo smexxy.